Flor de Maria Sánchez, 33, is a Mexican immigrant and mother of four. This interview was conducted in Spanish, then translated into English.
SFR:
We're in your room at St. Vincent [Regional Medical Center]. Why are you here?
FMS:
I am here in the hospital because I have leukemia. Right now, I am receiving a new chemotherapy treatment. My leukemia was diagnosed at the beginning of January. That is when they told me that it is very advanced but that I had a chance to fight it.
Have the treatments been successful?
Everything was going well until the fifth chemotherapy treatment. After the fifth one, a week later, I felt really bad, I could feel a strong pain inside my bones, especially my legs. A new biopsy was taken, and the doctors realized that the leukemia had returned much more aggressively. As a last option, I'm being treated with a new kind of chemotherapy. They tell me I have an 18 percent chance that this one will work and kill the bad cells of the cancer. It's the first time that this treatment has been used here in New Mexico because my case of leukemia is very rare.
Early on, what were your symptoms?
Last year, there were four or five months when I just felt so tired and weak, and I have always been a very healthy person. Then the pain began in my lower back. It just would not go away. Then in November, I noticed a growth, like a ball, between my legs. Then my eyes began hurting to the point that at times I could not see well. I could not drive. In December, more growths emerged all over my body. It was not until Dec. 28 when I had my blood analyzed.
What were you told?
The doctors said the analysis was bad. Then more tests were ordered, more blood tests, X-rays, an ultrasound, an MRI, everything. After all that, the doctor told me, 'Do you know what leukemia is?' and I said 'Yes.' He said, 'Well, you have leukemia.'
How did you handle the news?
I did not cry or shout or anything. I was in shock. I did react when my 16-year-old son, José Luis, who was by my side, turned to me and said, 'Mamita, you have leukemia and you are going to die and I do not want you to die.' And then he hugged me and cried and said, 'I don't want you to die. I need you!' When my son hugged me, I began to cry even though inside I was telling myself, 'Flor, you need to be strong. Your children need you.'
Can you talk a little more about your kids?
Yes [wiping away tears], well, I have four children. The oldest is 16, then Flor de Maria is 13, Enrique is 8 and Emiliano is 5. I would pick them up from school, help them with their homework. We always try to eat together. When we first came to New Mexico about three years ago, none of my children had ever seen snow, and so in the winters they have a lot of fun playing in the snow. In the summer, sometimes we go to Nambe, or go fishing in the river. We have our problems like any other family, but we have always been very close.
Last year in February you were remarried, right?
That is right; last year I got married. I am divorced from the father of my children and then got remarried. I married a man from California, a US citizen, and that is why I'm a legal resident now. But I have only been a legal resident for six months.
Before gaining your residency, what was it like to live in Santa Fe without legal papers?
You live with constant insecurity. It is very difficult. You live with fear that immigration agents could come and take you away. But I love living here because you can have a different kind of life. There are many more opportunities here. I have worked cleaning houses and in a nursing home, but my kids are going to go past high school! That is my dream as a mother.
How have you managed your hospital bills?
It has been very difficult. When I found out I had this disease, my husband didn't have health insurance for us and since I have only been a legal resident for six months, I cannot access any government programs. The hospital has been helping me a lot with many expenses, but not all of them.
If this new chemotherapy treatment can put the cancer in remission, what happens after that?
If it works then I will need a bone marrow transplant so that we can be sure that the leukemia won't return. The transplant is the only thing that can help me so that the leukemia doesn't return. I want to live, and I want to live because I know my children are young and they need me.
I understand that many of your friends are raising money to pay for the transplant.
Yes, many friends are helping me. It makes me feel so happy because I know they love me. [Donations can be made to the Flor de Maria Sánchez Donation Fund at Wells Fargo Bank].
I notice some santos here on the table. Are you a religious person?
Yes, I'm very religious. My faith is strong. I believe in God. Every time I fall, God lifts me up. I believe we're all here for a very special mission. And I believe in miracles.
