***image1***A column for anyone with questions about love.
Do you have a burning question about love? Write to TheTaoofLove@aol.com.
Dear Duncan,
In response to the guy who doesn't get enough blow jobs, let me give you a feminine point of view. What you said about dinners, listening and walks around the Plaza are all true, but you're missing a big point. Not only do women need those things to go from a toker to a smoker, but they also need the guy to get his ass off the couch and help around the house. I know that guy does not live with his girlfriend, but he's been over there every night for the last year probably waiting his ass on the couch for dinner while giving her a list of things to pick up for him while she's running her errands. He probably does his laundry over at her house too. In other words, he probably puts his laundry in her washer and leaves it for her to finish. He probably never takes out the trash, or helps clean the bathroom or the rest of the house that he helps mess up. Moreover, he probably never pays for any of her bills that he helps run up and I bet he expects her to pick up her half of the dinner bill when they go out while never considering what he uses at her house including her toilet paper, shampoo, toothpaste, soap, floss, laundry detergent, etc., not to mention wear and tear on everything in her house that he uses. I bet he's a deadbeat that probably does not deserve a blow job. If he doesn't want to be a partner in their relationship, maybe he can find a trashy street-walking hooker with no teeth who services all the other dicks in town too. Moreover, I'm wondering how often he goes down on her? That a very good point. As well, is it just a lick or two, or what? Are we talking a couple of minutes, or a real job. My boyfriend's wiener is real happy because he's the only man I've ever been with who considers these things. I used to be less than a toker, but now I'm a chain smoker. Smoking is good for your health!!!!
Jumpin' jiminy-you've dated some real bastards. Either that, or you have a time machine and you've been traveling back 100 years to find your boyfriends. Whatever the case, I hope and believe that your experience with men is unusual. It's clear you have some relationship issues-you've let so many men walk all over you that you now assume most men are deadbeats. Do you even know why you cooked, cleaned and did laundry for all those losers? I'd be willing to bet your father wasn't the most progressive hippy in the commune.
Let's return to blow jobs. You wrote that Sticky Tissue (the guy who wrote the original blow job letter) probably doesn't deserve a blow job. This statement proves that you are not a smoker. Smokers love to give blow jobs for their own pleasure, not because they've found the only man on the planet who buys toilet paper, takes out the trash, cleans the bathroom and likes to eat his girlfriend's pussy. You give your boyfriend blow jobs as a reward for his good behavior. If you were a true smoker, the blow job would be your reward for good behavior, not the other way around. You, my friend, are a toker who's merely found a good way for getting men to do their own laundry.
Many women use the reward/punishment system with blow jobs, and all of them are tokers. Obviously, a smoker wouldn't withhold a blow job because she would be punishing herself. A dworkin (woman who hates blow jobs) wouldn't give a guy a blow job if he dragged 12 orphans out of a burning building (let alone suck a dick for buying toothpaste). Only tokers have the right temperament to give out or withhold blow jobs depending on the domestic training of their boyfriends. And that's perfectly fine. I won't perform my Drunken Monkey Dance unless my girlfriend takes out the trash.
