Obama Wins!
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1 Obama wins!
Socialism never felt so exhilarating.
2 Campaign 2012: It’s finally over!
Everyone but McKayla Maroney is impressed.
3 Gene Hackman allegedly beats up homeless guy.
During a confused bout of believing he was Lex Luthor.
4 In strange, Wes Anderson-esque twist, Hackman apparently knew the guy.
And started calling him Pagoda.
5 “Specially trained” bike cops to deploy in Santa Fe.
As long as they’re trained to put up with a little healthy ridicule.
6 TV station’s pre-election exposé finds two non-citizens who voted in New Mexico.
When Heather Wilson wins by two votes, we’ll know why.
7 News reports: Navajo Nation endorses Heather Wilson, then Martin Heinrich, then no one.
Also known as hedging your bets.