1
game of thrones IS BACK ON TV
Sorry, women everywhere.
2
COPS NAB TWO IN ELDORADO HEIST
Note to readers: Capers dreamed up during meth-smoking sessions have a high probability of failure.
3
TED CRUZ WON'T BE ON NM PRIMARY BALLOT
Who cares?
4
JUDGE FINALLY ASSIGNED TO GRIEGO CASE
There's at least this one guy in the state who doesn't have a horse in that race.
5
POP-TARTS TO FEATURE NEW SODA FLAVORS
Because soda and pastry icing should always be part of a balanced breakfast.
6
blESS ME ULTIMA TO BECOME AN OPERA
Reading is still sexy, though, and you can get the book now!
7
COMEDIAN HANNIBAL BURESS SCHEDULES LAST-MINUTE SHOW IN SF
You're the last to know.
