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- SECRETARY OF STATE CANDIDATE PROMISE TO WRESTLE SWAMP MONSTERS
Those new ballot boxes look scary.
- ONLINE POLL SAYS PEARCE WON TV DEBATE IN GOVERNOR’S RACE
And we all know TV station web polls are pretty much gospel.
- TRUMP SPEECH AT UN GETS LAUGHS
Relax. They’re laughing at America, first.
- INSTAGRAM CO-FOUNDERS STEP DOWN FROM $100 BILLION COMPANY
Is this the beginning of the end of our screen-addled digital hellscape?
- TRIAL BEGINS IN MONICA YOUNGBLOOD DWI
Not sure the “I literally fight for you guys” defense will work in court. BREAKING: It didn’t.
- DUNKIN’ DONUTS CHANGES NAME TO JUST DUNKIN’
Say hello to the International House of Donuts, suckers.
- MARTINEZ APPROVAL RATING DIPS TO 35 PERCENT
It just keeps dunkin’.
