artdirector@sfreporter.com
1. BRITNEY SPEARS VISITED LAS VEGAS (NOT OUR LAS VEGAS) MEOW WOLF EXHIBIT OMEGA MART
How good is that song “Toxic?” Sooooo good, right?
2. LAS VEGAS (THIS TIME IT’S OURS) MEAT PLANT OWNER DENIES ANIMAL CRUELTY ACCUSATIONS
Not to split hairs, but what else do we call killing animals in the first place?
3. SANTA FE WOMAN’S CLUB TURNS 130
And it doesn’t look a day over 120.
4. BIDEN UNVEILS SPACE PHOTO SAYING, “WE CAN GO PLACES NO ONE HAS GONE BEFORE”
Meanwhile, on Earth, we’ll never be able to afford a house and this whole inflation/shrinkflation thing really sucks huge.
5. ZOZOBRA VOICE AUDITIONS WERE REPORTEDLY PRETTY METAL
Which is basically what you’re looking for in a performance from a demon being burned alive while we all laugh in his dumb face.
6. WE HEAR THERE’S A NEW SOFT-SERVE ICE CREAM TRUCK IN TOWN
Screaammmm!
7. MEDIAN HOUSE PRICE IN SANTA FE TOPS $789,000
See, Biden?! What were we just saying?!?
