artdirector@sfreporter.com
1. LOCAL PROSECUTORS, PUBLIC DEFENDERS GET $300K FOR RECRUITMENT, RETENTION
Never mind what it says about our system that defense lawyers had to join the DA’s Office to get anyone’s attention.
2. NANCY PELOSI COMES TO ABQ, SAYS GOVERNMENT’S “TREMENDOUS MISTAKE” CAUSED HERMITS PEAK/CALF CANYON FIRE
Well, shit, Madam Speaker, Northern New Mexico is grateful for this stunning revelation.
3. NASA VAPORIZES ITS OWN ASSET TO TEST WHETER WE CAN AVOID “ARMAGEDDON”
Jerry Bruckheimer and his band of merry men responsible for the 1998 classic thank the feds for sparing Ben Affleck.
4. ITALY ELECTS ITS FIRST WOMAN PREMIERE
What’s that, you say? Giorgia Meloni is pretty much a fascist? No worries; that’s always gone well for Italy.
5. GOV. LUJAN GRISHAM ANNOUNCES NEW CYBERTHREAT COMMITTEE
And they’re gonna be all like, “Hurry, Johnny Laserpunch! If we don’t stop the hackers from jacking into the mainframe, our rollerblading skills will mean nothing!”
6. SUSPECTED ARSONIST LIT 16 FIRES IN SANTA FE LAST WEEKEND, NO ARREST YET
What’s the matter? Couldn’t get all the way to 17?
7. BALLOON FIESTA STARTS THIS WEEKEND
Find more hot air, along with a hot Friday night date when the gubernatorial candidates debate on TV for the first of two planned faceoffs.
