artdirector@sfreporter.com
1. EARLY VOTING HAS BEGUN
Don’t say we didn’t warn you.
2. NEW CANNABIS CONTROL DIVISION DIRECTOR SAYS COMPLIANCE ENFORCEMENT IS A TOP GOAL
Oh, weird, our top cannabis goals are mostly snack-, nap- and music-based, but OK, guy.
3. NEW MEXICO FACES TEACHER SHORTAGE...
It’s beyond time to stop making them pay for their own classroom supplies.
4. ...BUT COLLEGE ENROLLMENT IS UP POST-PANDEMIC
Is there any hope some of them are majoring in education?
5. CITY HOLDS SECRET RIBBON CUTTING FOR WEST ALAMEDA REOPENING
Way to double down on the whole “transparency” thing!
6. FIRST SERVE STARTS LAYING CONCRETE FOR NEW TENNIS CENTER
We tried to come up with a joke here, but we didn’t know if John McEnroe was still famous enough for it.
7. FLAG FOOTBALL, CRICKET AND SQUASH ADDED TO 2028 LOS ANGELES OLYMPICS
Now they’re just adding anything. Next it’ll be tetherball and pillow fights and freeze tag.