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MEATY PORN?
The "Savage Love" column [Letters, May 17:
"No Love Lost"; "Gory"; "Feeding Back"; "On Board"; "Super Savage"; "More Advice"
] may be an attempt to balance with meaty earthiness the subtle fluttering of unseen wings in the heavenly light of New Mexico…Pornography is a fact of life, and when you wondered if Santa Fe was not "ready" for "Savage Love," you may have been hoping for our acceptance of that fact. He is a charismatic writer but, unlike Duncan North, his words seem weighted with a rebellious hatred of the creative force, or the spiritual evolution possible when one is lovingly grounded in sexuality (such as indicated by his hoping to be sent a video of someone being forced to lick said life force off the floor.)
I recently advertised my healing work in the Annual Manual, because of its connection to the Chamber of Commerce Web site, but because of this column I would never do so in the Reporter itself, a fact I regret.
Bonita Powyr
Santa Fe
NO CLASS?
Let me preface this letter with the fact that I have been an avid reader of the Reporter for the entire 12-plus years that I have lived in Santa Fe. I have also been a sometime advertiser (through my husband's businesses). However, I must heartily agree with the letters printed in the May 10-16 edition of the paper protesting this column. It is without a doubt the most disgusting, ugly column that I have ever had the misfortune of laying eyes on. And let me say-I am not a prude-but I really feel that the Reporter is CLASSIER than this. AND so is Santa Fe. The "Savage Love" column in this week's paper is just as bad. I urge you to please reconsider the publication of this column.
Kim Thibodeaux
Santa Fe
HETERO LOVE
Just so that you're hearing from someone other than uptight Christian types-I'm a 40-something hetero married chick and I LOVE Dan Savage!!! Thank god for some smart, real, no-nonsense talk about human sexuality. Oh yeah, and funny as hell. It's the first thing I read in the Reporter now. That post-Tao/pre-Savage column was awful.
Cecilia Renn Kurzweg
Santa Fe
REALITY BUTTS
Look at all the uproar over anal sex. Come on people, we all have an asshole. It's a reality. Anal sex exists. It is fun for some of us and involves cleanup. There are more horrific things unfolding in the world! I support Dan Savage. Personally I would rather hear some feedback about the current Immigration Reform bills that are unfolding, or some anger about the wall that is being built. These are some of the realities that disgust me. These are but a few of the realities that we should be analyzing.
Vince Jones
Santa Fe
FREE LOVE
Please, anyone out there who enjoys "Savage Love," write to the editor and let her know. When we hate something we all yell and scream; let's do the same to support instead. I would hate to see the Reporter stop publishing this column due to hate mail.
Free speech does not mean that if I like something then it is acceptable and if I don't like it then it shouldn't be in print. The freedom to speak, express oneself and to print and read what one sees fit is one of the few rights that has thus far managed to avoid the influx of attacks on the civil liberties of the citizens of this country. I CHOSE not to read the past relationship/sex/love columns in the Reporter because I found them tediously boring. I CHOOSE to read "Savage Love" because I find it interesting and entertaining. (And Duncan's column was no more youth "appropriate" than "Savage Love" is.) Dan Savage is witty, eloquent and politically conscious. He answers questions that everyone else is afraid to ask, let alone answer. If this is the worst and most offensive column that people have read, then there are residents in this town who are living an incredibly sheltered life and need to work on expanding their horizons.
Human sexuality in all its many facets is something to be celebrated, not shamed. In this country we are not very good at that and in turn have one of the most sexually repressed populations in the world. Sex can be addressed as roses and champagne or whips and chains, tactfully or crassly; nonetheless, it's all sex and therefore a topic that, when addressed frankly, will always have at least one person out there offended. What we need is more addressing of the topic of sex in a candid manner and less fear of discussing sexuality. Get over it. It's a sex column; that means it should talk about sex in all of its reality!
Samia van Hattum
Santa Fe
LUST FOR LIFE
I appreciate "Savage Love," because the questions and answers there usually provoke me to reconsider the limitations of my familial and cultural attitudes toward sexual pleasure. Here's a little trivia to add to the discussion:
During the 1930s, two personalities dominated the US newspapers and US newsreels: Mae West and Adolf Hitler. Mae West is famous for asking, "Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?" Adolf Hitler is famous for saying, "Deutschland uber alles!"
Joseph Campbell defined libido as "lust for life." Seems to me that on Planet Earth we either "lust for life" or we "lust for death." We either serve Eros or we serve Thanatos. We are either pleasure-seeking creatures or we are pain-seeking creatures.
Civilized culture serves death, Thanatos and pain. Just look at the historical record. Here in Santa Fe, some people actually help create weapons of mass destruction, so it's probably hard for them to consider Eros. Their jobs depend on serving Thanatos.
Also there are people here who believe that sex is for creating babies. It's really for creating pleasure, but our puritanical culture cannot tolerate that. People who enjoy themselves and their lovers are not so desperate for intimate affection that they will follow any Fuhrer who promises any kind of superiority or any kind of immortality. Wilhelm Reich wrote a whole book on how sexual frustration is the foundation of fascism. It explains a lot about politics in the United States.
Also here in Fanta Se (I know how to spell), we have an over-emphasis on the spiritual and mental aspects of being human. Because I have personally spent decades in these pursuits myself, I can suggest that the reason we lonely, unconnected people do that is because we simply do not know how to get real, skin-to-skin love into our daily lives. We crave the nourishment of physical affection and intimacy, but we stuff ourselves with the assorted abstractions of this or that spiritual/mental teaching. We stay dissatisfied.
But, we New Mexicans could offer the whole country some "sexual healing," if we reinstated the original Kokopelli. The real Kokopelli had a huge hard-on, and the missionaries erased it. How about an aroused Kokopelli statue in the Plaza instead of that harsh phallic symbol dedicated to death-by-war?
Then, we'd be a real City Different!
Keep "Savage Love," because most of us need to be provoked.
Kathairein Magdalena
Santa Fe
TAOLESS
You asked for readers' opinion on "Savage Love." Well, while I do appreciate its frankness about sex (I think we're far too prudish and can use this dose of reality-we all have the parts and most of us use them), I miss Duncan North's column, the "Tao of Love." I not only liked Mr. North's style and ability to be funny while addressing writers' questions dead-on, I miss the fact that the column was local-Santa Feans could write and ask their own relationship questions. When are you going to bring back the "Tao of Love?"
Megan Quenzer
Santa Fe
BREATHE DEEP
Whether I find a column offensive or enjoyable to me or not, I would not want any expression or freedom of speech to be censored within your paper. I read certain columns; I'm glad there is a diverse range offered. I will read what I want to read, when I want to read it. The only censorship I agree with is my own upon myself. I appreciate the right to choose. I find others' censorship imposed upon me more offensive than an issue of a letter published with "questionable" content. I'm rolling my eyes at the uproar letters, shaking my head…just relax, breathe deep; you have made it a bigger deal than it ever needed to be. If you're still in doubt, ask the kids you're assuming would be so are wounded. They let it go right after they said "Aww gross!" There's no such thing as too much information. Who has the right to govern another? Come on people:
Don't like the column, don't read it.
Don't like something on TV, turn it off.
Think a movie is bad, don't go see it.
But don't impose upon my right to do so. I cherish my right to choose and the freedom to expose myself to whatever is out there. Keep "Savage Love" in the Reporter. I read Robert Odom and I'm glad they are BOTH in the paper. Ha, silly silly ones…life strange…people funny!!
C Finlayson
Santa Fe
THE MAO OF LOVE
While I find Dan Savage to be alternately rude, egotistical, and sexist, I also find his column to be necessary and on occasion enjoyable. This is especially true in a time when our basic civic rights are being eroded. The (primarily female) readers who would have you kill his column are using an argument that works against the tenets of democracy.
Miller vs. California
(while recognizing the earlier removal of First Amendment protection for "obscenity" in
Roth vs. USA
) states "literary, artistic, political, or scientific value" as a benchmark. I can think of NOTHING more valuable in a democratic society than FREE AND DIVERSE THOUGHT. If you don't want to read about sex, move to China and have Mao shoved up your ass instead.
Wyndham Carlisle
Santa Fe
S-E-X
Thank you Reporter for bringing Dan Savage to the Southwest! Over the years, "Savage Love" has given me more accurate sex info than high school "health class" and strangers combined. Now that everybody knows about the column, those who don't like it can decide not to read it, and to censor it from their kids, too. Good for them!
But that's not enough, is it? Lois "not being particularly straight-laced myself" Manno and Honey "I'm not a prude; however…" Ward don't want people to read anything THEY disapprove of. They want to censor it for everyone, so nobody can read sex-positive information. Does the word SEX trigger some terrified puritan/genetic response that makes them sweat and stare down at their shoes? Let's hope their children don't learn about s-e-x from strangers after it's too late. They tyrannically threaten legal action, and remind us all how advertisers "paid a shitload of money" to be there.
Most advertisers are smart enough to realize that they don't have to agree with everything they read to still happily reach the Reporter's diverse audience. I encourage the raging "American Taliban" types (Savage's words), to leave the rest of us alone and perhaps turn to the Journal, where they can nod their heads in agreement, and Ziggy's chastity is inoffensive.
Oh, and I depend on the Reporter when in Santa Fe, freely spending my bucks with people who advertise within.
Chris Lucas
Albuquerque
OVER THE TOP
While I am a liberal person in most regards, and consider education an important thing for all persons, "Savage Love" is a bit over the top for an all-ages community newspaper. Many of the letters and replies I feel do not belong in a paper of this type and go into too much graphic details on sexual matters that I do not even care to read about! If I had children, I would be very concerned, and probably ban the paper from my house. While his advice is very straightforward and has merit, I believe that much of the subject matter is not appropriate. Please edit it, or omit it all together.
Susan Weber
Santa Fe
The Reporter welcomes original, signed letters to the editor. Letters (no more than 200 words) should refer to specific articles in the Reporter. They may be edited for clarity and space. Please include address and phone number for verification purposes; these will not be published.
