Usually we miss those National Days...like, National Hot Dog Water Day or, like, National Licorice But Not the Kind You’re Thinking Of Day. Not this year, though. Or, more precisely, not this one singular time. As luck would have it, National Watermelon Day is coming up on Wednesday, Aug. 3, and you know what that means—IT’S TIME FOR A TOTALLY ACCURATE AND IN NO WAY JOKEY LESSON ON THE WATERMELON!!!!!!! GAAAHHHHH!!!!!
At 92% water, watermelons have the odd distinction of being regarded as both a fruit AND a vegetable. So while they originate from a flower most commonly pollinated by bugs, they’re also considered more gourd-like to the farmers who, y’know, farm them.
There are something like 1,200 kinds of watermelon, though we as people who eat them generally come up against about four: seeded, non-seeded (aka seedless), icebox (being those little guys) and the yellow variety which, if you were paying attention last year, The Fork loves but can almost never find.
You know how you’ve heard of square watermelons from the fine folks of Japan? Yes, that’s a thing, and that’s great, but did you know the island nation has soooo many other weird watermelon shapes? Well, at least a handful. We’re talking perfect orbs, pyramids—even human-face-shaped! Check it out right here.
We’ve told you before, but it bears repeating that watermelons are an excellent source of lycopene, an antioxidant that has been shown to reduce the risk of cancer. We’re not a doctor and this is not medical advice, we’re just saying that you could do a lot worse than watermelon.
We read someplace that explorer types used to use watermelons like makeshift canteens, and we can totally believe that. You ever cut one up and made booze inside it? Of course it’ll hold booze—we mean water, actually, but yeah, you can booze up a watermelon, shit.
Watermelons are the State Vegetable of Oklahoma, and we think that’s O-K-L-A-H-O-M-A-OK.
Lastly, we’re almost positive we shared the info with you once before, but we think it also bears repeating (in image form), so here’s how to pick a good watermelon:
brianna@sfreporter.com
“WE KNOW WE BELONG TO THE LAND,” screams a watermelon, probably.
Also
-We were just talking about the Marquez Deli moving to the CHOMP Food Hall last week, and we’ve since learned that it will change its name to Alex NYC Deli (in honor of chef Alex Hadidi) and that it will apparently be open from 7 am-2 am? We were wary of that, but according to a recent Facebook post on the Marquez Deli page, those are indeed the hours. Is it possible they mean 2 pm? Probably! But here we are.
-We just heard about NOSA Restaurant & Inn, a new place out there by Ojo Caliente. And yes, it’s initials for “North of Santa Fe.” What’s on the menu? We don’t even know yet!
-Seems some dude thought it would be a cool idea to pop over to Palace Avenue restaurant La Casa Sena and set it on fire earlier in the week. No one was injured and there was no major damage reported.
While we’re sharing showtunes...
More Tidbits
-Speaking of National Days, we know that National Chocolate Chip Cookie Day is coming up on Aug. 4, because the very nice people at Tate’s Bake Shop (those are the ones at the store in the green bags...you know the ones?) wrote us to say they’re offering 20% off their whole site on that day if you use the code COOKIEDAY. Now, you might think this is some kind of paid thing, but it’s not—we just think they’re pretty OK cookies and thought you’d want some, too.
-Caveman Coffee’s doing a giveaway kind of thing, too, only theirs comes with stipulations. If you go to this link and do the things it says, you might could win all kinds of mugs and a blanket and stuff. The stuff, honestly, is pretty cool!
-If Brach’s putting out a hot dog-flavored version of its already disgusting Candy Corn isn’t proof that God is dead and we now live only in shadow, we don’t know what is. In case you weren’t clear on what we said, we’ll repeat it: Brach’s, the candy company, has released a new kind of Candy Corn that tastes like hot dogs. There’s also a burger one. And fruit punch, which sounds less gross.
-The Choco Taco, being an ice cream-based taco with choco in and on it, has been discontinued. You read that right, buds—Choco Taco no more, but welcome a new era of hot dog-flavored candy. People are bummed, and rightly so.
-Lastly in not just local news, a plea to return the noble veggie burger to a veggie thing, which is to say Eater-dot-com’s Jaya Saxena misses when veggie burgers weren’t just meat-reminiscent who-knows-what. We’re with her, even if we’ll totally demolish an Impossible Burger.
A Totally Scientific Breakdown of The Fork’s Correspondence
In the print edition of this week’s SFR, everything is all about Best of Santa Fe. There’s a huge food section, too!
Number of Letters Received
19
*You’re probably busy doing summer stuff.
Most Helpful Tip of the Week (a barely edited letter from a reader)
“What if we don’t even like spinach?”
*Don’t eat it?
Actually Helpful Tip(s)
“You should seek therapy.”
*Shouldn’t everyone? Naw, but this is good advice.
92% Water,
The Fork
