We just got tangerined within an inch of our life. Yes, friends, we love a good citrus jam (or many citrus jamz), and thanks to the three tangerines from Natural Grocers, we’re basically sitting over here like, “Dang, tangerines are good, and we should remind everyone.”
Two things before we remind you further: We took your survey responses to heart last week, so there will be no recipe for tangerine whatevers (a new cookie we just made up in our minds that we WON’T describe how to make) and this one will not be all long. We heard you. You hate length. And making things. Yeah, you’re likely to see lots of experimental Fork lengths and things in 2022. This is because we love you and also because we’re a loner, Dottie—a rebel. And we can’t be all beholden to the beholdening, you know what we mean? Don’t think. We could be clearer.
Anyway, without further ado, let’s get into A TOTALLY REAL AND IN NO WAY FAKE HISTORY/FACT LESSON ON THE NOBLE TANGERINE!!!!!
First off, we hear there’s a bit of a tangerine origin dispute amongst Japan, China and India, though the name refers to Tangier, that super-gorgeous Moroccan seaport through which the fruit would travel. Maybe the citizens just loved them more? We’d love for there to be a new rule where whoever loves a thing the most gets to name it. That’s why tangerines should be called Little Forkies (TM) from now until the end of days.
Rumor has it tangerines made their way to America in the mid-1800s, when a visiting Italian diplomat gifted the people of New Orleans some trees, which he planted his dang self. It might not occur to you that New Orleans played a massive role in the shaping of this country, because you’re a jerk, but surely you’re familiar with the old saying, “When a fruit gets big in the Big Easy, everyone else will one day love it, too.
Mandarins and tangerines are not the same thing, though the tangerine is indeed an offshoot of the mandarin. All you have to do is taste them to know the difference. Oh, and we’d never heard this before, but we discovered through our painstaking research that tangerines are sometimes called easy peelers because you-know-why. We’d never heard that before, but we checked with our grandma who said she had two cousins from North Dakota who called them easy peelers. This was also grandma’s nickname in high school, she said. Jay-kay.
Today, most of the country’s tangerines are grown in California (duh), Texas (duh), Florida (duh) and Arizona (who knew they grew anything in Arizona besides old-fashioned racism?) Apparently, after the New Orleans thing, the tangerine made its way to Florida which was the first for-real state to grow ‘em in earnest. Thanks, Florida! You’re also racist!
Lastly, you should know there are three main tangerine tree types, and they all sound adorable, from the Honey Tangerine tree to the Algerian Tangerine tree and the Sunburst Tangerine tree. Sunburst Tangerine sounds like an asshole’s fake name they gave themselves after they found out what being a hippie is.
So hail to thee, tangerine! We love you something fierce!
Something to listen to when you realize you’ve become a part of the natural universe now.
Also
-We just learned about Abiquiu eatery Café Sierra Negra, and while we concede that’s a long way to go for something, we hear they pickle their own veggies. This not only sounds like a delicious reason for a day drive, it’s good for your gut!
-We are pleased to report that after many months of being downgraded to Only OK in our book, Pizza Centro’s downtown Santa Fe location nailed a pizza so hard the other night that we dreamed about it after we were finished.
-Speaking of pizza, we hear that it was a successful yet imperfect launch at Paloma offshoot Esquina Pizza on Guadalupe Street, but that we should keep our ears to the ground for more news soon as Paloma chef/pizza champ Nathan Mayes zeroes in on the perfect recipes and serving methodology. For what it’s worth, that pizza genius we wrote about a couple weeks back took a look at local pizza menus and said Esquina looks to be the most exciting of all.
-We’ve also just been informed that this week’s print edition features a brief interview with the founder of the Santa Fe Foodies website and Facebook group, Robert McCormick (you can read that here.) Not to get too gossipy, but word on the street is that McCormick banned another FB group facilitator from his group—Dana Tate of the cumbersomely named Updates on Santa Fe Restaurants and Complementary Businesses—and now Tate has banned McCormick from hers. We look forward to frantic emails from both/either of them, and remind everyone that Facebook is stupid and who does or doesn’t ban you is stupid. We do love the drama, though.
-Don’t forget about the 33rd National Fiery Foods & BBQ show in Albuquerque this weekend, March 4-6. $15.50 at the gate? Worth it! Learn more on the website.
Have a tangerine right now—while you’re watching TV. Do you ever watch something and think, “Oh, these people are all dead now?”
A Totally Scientific Breakdown of The Fork’s Correspondence
In this week’s print edition of SFR, our editor visited Horno Restaurant from Street Food Institute champion/chef David Sellers. Did he love it? Did he hate it? Click and find out.
Number of Letters Received
19
*You just drop right off, huh?
Most Helpful Tip of the Week (a barely edited letter from a reader)
”Please stop. Seriously, I can’t stop reading The Fork, but i hate it so much. Just stop.”
*Never!
Actually Helpful Tip(s)
”Copper pans, friend.”
*A friend of ours explaining why the omelette they made looked so fluffy and beautiful.
We’d rather be tangerine-ing,
The Fork
